Why don't you ad rats just call it what it really is? Black Friday + 3. Some people might get the wrong impression and think that "Cyber Monday" is some new kind of way to get all community oriented and quiver all over from the sheer touchy-feeliness of the whole thing. Since 2005 a lot of people have been fooled into thinking that they're going to "reach out and touch" others online, just like the old Bell Telephone gimmick from the 20th Century. Reach out and touch, my ass. The only thing good about Cyber Monday is that when people shop in droves online they don't stampede and trample other shoppers or store employees to death. So, at least there's that.
That's right, Cyber Monday, my ass. What it is, you dumb asses, is just another way for suckers like you to empty your wallets and your bank accounts and to max out your credit cards in order to buy shit online that you probably don't need and only want because you think it's such a bargain. Man, did they ever see you suckers coming. "Never give a sucker an even break because there's one born every minute nanosecond." That's their motto.
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