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| Just what we need. Another filthy piece-a-shit TV show about Las Vegas. |
Saturday, September 29, 2012
Decadence: Our Second Biggest Enemy
Sunday, September 23, 2012
Monday, September 17, 2012
Sunday, September 9, 2012
Thursday, September 6, 2012
Friday, August 31, 2012
Clint Goes Pollywood
Click on Clint Eastwood for the L.A. Times News Story
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| "Clint Pollywood & Prez" Do Republican National Convention |
Watch the Video Here
Saturday, August 11, 2012
Friday, July 20, 2012
Sunday, July 15, 2012
Saturday, July 7, 2012
Sunday, June 10, 2012
In Your Face
Author's Note 04-07-14: The whole point of this video post is that nobody likes somebody "being in your face" and being proud of it, on top of that. And yet people on TV are "in your face" each and every day of your lives, especially people on cable news and on the Internet, with hidden agendas designed to titillate, frighten and scare you into being what they want you to be. A case in point is Google, which owns Blogger. Google is in my face, everyday, pulling all kinds of techno tricks in order to prevent me from reaching you. This is my last day online with my Windows XP personal computer. I actually got online with my Android mini laptop but I couldn't add this note to this post with it. While I typed, words started going into the address bar, then popup windows came up asking me if I wanted to do this or that. Then words started going in fron of the video. So, fuck you Goolge, I know who and what you are and why. But you'll never keep me out of the global arena. Not now and not ever. I'll be in your face, right back at you. And you started it.
Tuesday, May 8, 2012
Cut!
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| "That's enough of that shit." |
I once heard that when Clint Eastwood is directing a movie, he has a unique way of telling everybody when a scene is over. I like his style so I'm quoting him here. And, yep, you bet, this scene is over. The one where I blog on a regular basis because I think people are giving a shit about making a better world for all of us. So much for that pipe dream.
The only people who ever came here were mostly SEO software hawkers, Russian ad dogs and shit-eating adf.ly spammers, after finding out how to make those deceptive "tiny urls" (illegal redirect links that won't break) to insert into their email spam and phishing scams. Fuck them.
These "Internet tape worms" didn't read shit here. They just looked me up and down, ran a quickie stat feeler gauge between my blog's images and the text content, and then skedaddled like a bunch of plundering pirates. Septic web worms. Dark-ass souls like yours have guaranteed that no Earthling will ever walk on the surface of another planet.
Saturday, April 14, 2012
Monday, March 26, 2012
Shit Mail
The following is a "public service announcement" from Ted O'Hooey. That's right, public service. At this stage of his ornery life, nothing less could get him to endure the agony of facing a web cam again. So, if you don't like the idea of a pissin' and moanin' public service announcement, then take your mouse and hit the road. It's no skin off our asses.
Monday, March 12, 2012
Saturday, March 3, 2012
It's To Laugh
Jumpin' Jeezus, whatever happened to free speech in America? Free speech was intended for all American citizens, not just a select few whiners who have a bug up their asses 24/7. Losers who expect everyone else to listen to their pathetic complaints about life in general and then the listeners are supposed to just be quiet and then later listen to more of this whining, crying shit? Hey, wake up America! That's not freedom of speech. That's a whiner's and a loser's paradise. America wasn't founded by a bunch of whiners and losers.
A case in point is all the ridiculous hubbub about conservative radio talk show host Rush Limbaugh and the whining public's demand that he apologize to Sandra Fluke for insulting her on the air because she wants to testify at a Congressional hearing supporting an Obama Administration policy that requires religion-affiliated institutions to provide health care coverage for their employees that covers birth control. Wow. You gotta run that shit through your head several times before it gels.
OK, so what does all this have to do with Georgetown University student Sandra Fluke? Is she also an employee? And, I'm sorry, but Rush Limbaugh — offensive prick that he is — is right. Why should any tax dollars ever be used to support any kind of sexual activity in the private sector? Or any other sector, for that matter. That's right. Buy your own birth control pills. Get your own rubbers. Or, better yet, try celibacy. It'll save us all a lot of fucking money and a lot of whining-ass heartache in the long run.
So, when Rush Limbaugh called Sandra Fluke a "slut" and a "prostitute" for being "paid" to have sex (by using tax dollars to fund her health coverage that included coverage for birth control) and then suggested that she post videos of herself making whoopee online so that American taxpayers can get something for their money, he was being flippant. It was an ugly but very poignant joke. Sure he was being caustic, sarcastic, mean-spirited and nasty. You bet. Just about as gross and mean as you can get. That's what the conservative Republican whiner Rush Limbaugh does best.
But, hey, guess what? You dumb fucks got the message, didn't you? Too bad you had to hear it from an over-indulged whiner like Rush Limbaugh. Why were you liberal freaks listening to a conservative talk show anyway? Huh? Well, let me guess. You were looking for more excuses to whine and cry. More ammo to support you life as a goddamn, pathetic whiner. You sorry losers. You self-inflict yourselves with loser losses.
But don't think you're alone. That's what Rush Limbaugh is. He's a Republican hardliner — and a major whiner — with a great big bug up his ass about anything and everyone that isn't in line with his views on life. If anyone out there is spending any goddamn tax dollars anywhere, he thinks it's coming directly out of his own goddamn pocket. Arrogant prick. A redneck? You bet he is. But, hey, I'm not going to sit here and type out a bunch of bad words about a radio entertainer so you can use them to attack him, with my support. Get your own bad words about Rush Limbaugh. And, as far as Sandra Fluke goes, you can get your own bad words about her, too. Rush did.
And, oh yes, you bet, President Obama — always the political opportunist — is busy making those supportive "We Are The World" phone calls for the press to dog and he's getting all those wonderful accolades from the liberal-ass press and lots and lots of Facebook Wall time from cryin' American whiners and a shitload of liberal, whining-ass Tweets. Hell, yes. This guy saw the handwriting on the wall in a nanosecond and it said, "Man, these sorry-ass, whining suckers walked right into it. Right into it. And now their sorry, whining-and-crying liberal-ass votes are mine."
You know what? It's to laugh.
Sunday, February 19, 2012
Ellis Wanderly: The Lost Video
A week ago I made a video with my cowboy wannabe cousin, Tic Tickedofferson, and it "went south" almost immediately because he was so mean and nasty. Tic said it "went south" because I was so mean and nasty. So, I posted the damn thing anyway so viewers (if there were any) could make up their own minds about it.
Hell, I was so sure that the video with Tic was ruined because of him and not me that I invited an old high-school chum of mine, Ellison Ian Wanderly, to do a short video about extraterrestrials. My little "studio" was still a mess after Tic had wrecked it a week earlier with his big beer belly but most of the equipment was still in good enough shape to video Ellis Wanderly, whose high-pitched, squeaky voice wouldn't sound all that different on the broken, tinnny mike Tic Tickedofferson left in his wake.
When the video with Ellis started "going south" he naturally blamed it on me and then proceeded to show me what an old egghead beekeeper from California's Santa Barbara County can do when he's pushed too far. I was impressed. Damn, I had no idea. Anyway, this "lost video" is my tribute to Ellis Ian Wanderly, the beekeeper you never want to mess with.
Sunday, February 12, 2012
Tic Tickedofferson
Author's Notice 10-18-13: Hey, Blogger or Google, (what's the difference?), you can go screw yourself for cutting my videos in half, for dumping them, for making me re-upload them every year or so, just because they're not the kind of sick, twisted, crap that disrespects and devalues human life. That's what you have YouTube for. So, keep your paws off my video posts. And you know goddamn well you can't watch this video on YouTube because I never put it there. You re-directing sonzabitches. Go cornhole yourselves.
Thursday, February 9, 2012
Monday, February 6, 2012
Eating Dogshit in America
Hats off t0 McDonald's for having the courage to make a bold statement about the dangers of petting a stray pit bull (or any fucking pit bull for that matter). And fuck you pit bull lovers who think you assholes and your stupid carnivore pets are immune from criticism. People, like me, who think freedom should include the right to be safe from dogs in public have a right to our dissent, too. Pit bull owner outrage? I couldn't believe my fucking eyes! You pathetic assholes. Your dogs are a menace to society and you goddamn well know it.
So, you're outraged, are you? Fuck you. The real outrage is that America would be a lot safer without dangerous domestic carnivores in our fucking faces. You fucking pussies. Maybe you'll sue McDonald's for a million bucks just like that stupid old hag did back in the 1980s after she spilled a cup of coffee on herself at McDonald's and then blamed McDonald's for not warning her that the coffee was hot. Stupid bitch. I hope that gold-digging hag got run over by a fucking bus.
I'm serious. I've had it with you goddamn fucking people. Who in the fuck do you think you are? Jesus Christ, there's a goddamn whining-ass support group for every disaffected asswipe on this goddamn fucking planet and now people who own the ugliest, meanest, most dangerous dogs on the goddamn planet want us to kiss their fucking asses. Well, fuck you. When your fucking dogs bite people you both should be euthanized.
Just last week a 61-year-old Chicago man was attacked by three pit bulls as he jogged through a park. Now he only has one foot to face retirement with. Yeah, the fucking dogs had his foot for lunch while he lay there, helpless, enduring this stupid, hideous, horrifying, painful, agonizing unnecessary shit. Where was the fucking pit bull owner? You cryin'-ass piece of dog shit. If I ran this fucking planet you'd all be extinct.
Hooray for McDonald's! America is all about freedom of speech and that includes freedom of speech for everyone, not just a select few. So, hey, don't apologize anymore to these namby-pamby pit bull fuckheads. Let these stupid "me-first" bastards eat at Burger King, where they can have it "their way".
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Ads Blow
It's been a while since any shit out there got me to the point where I'd bother to piss and moan about it on the Web. No, I'm not getting more tolerant about all the unnecessary shit in our lives, I've just been busy, that's all. That's right, I've usually got other fish to fry that are more important than pissin' and moanin' about something that only a handful of people will give a shit about.
But I finally got done fryin' those other fish for the time being and, hell, they're not very important, either. You know, things like getting the mail and going to the store and soaking your feet and taking out the garbage and shit like that. They might not sound very important but they're a lot higher on my to-do list than pissin' and moanin' about really important stuff that most people would only consider trivial.
That's right. Those big buckets of shit that most of you eat every fucking day are being eaten by you because you see everybody else eating them and you simply don't want to be left out. So, this blog post about "annoying ads" is not for you fuckers. You love ads. You love the shit they sell you. You watch an ad for something you don't need and don't really want and can't even afford and then you push and shove and knock heads and whine and cry until you get it. Because you think everybody else has it and got it first. Before you did. So, go away. Take a fucking hike. Turn on the boob tube, why don'tcha, and see what new shit they've come up with to pick your brains and your pockets.
You got it, this post isn't for you dumb fucks. It's for the hundred or maybe two hundred people in the entire world who can actually think for themselves and who, therefore, haven't eaten a single bucket of shit in their entire lives because, being smart people and independent thinkers, they know that, not only does shit not taste good, it's no goddamn good for you. Hell, this post might even annoy you because, Christ, you already know this shit and here I am boring you to death with it. Which makes you folks "my kind of people". But that's all right. It's worth the risk. Yep. I'll take a sock on the jib once in a while if it's for a good cause. Like awareness.
So, eating shit by the bucketful is not necessary, you see. And neither is being forced to endure ads, ads, ads, everyfuckingwhere you go just to get through a goddamn day. I mean, if you want to watch a news video on the Web and it starts out with a fucking ad, dump it. Fuck those asswipes. There are still plenty of online news sites and even famous newspapers that won't shove an ad down your throat just so you can see what's happening in the world. Ads are a fucking option. Even on TV. That's what recording devices are for. Record your favorite shows and watch them later. And fast-forward through those dip shit ads with all those dip shit people in them trying to sell you dip shit products and services that only a dip shit would want.
And there are enough fucking sidebar ads on Internet websites that you can click on if you fucking feel like it that you don't have to swallow a big gulp of shit you're not interested in just so you can hear what the President recently said or which team won last night or what some Hollywood shithead just did to get some more fucking attention. Christ Almighty, the ads on TV are bad enough without wading through them on the fucking Internet. These days, you almost need waders, not just boots, to waddle through the streams of shit that are "in your fucking face" before you even get to see a fucking glint of anything that might be even remotely newsworthy.
So, yeah, ads blow. And they blow big time. But you can minimize that shit by reading most of your online news, instead of waiting for the fucking ad to play out so you can wait for the rest of the fucking news video to load while you watch all those fucking Flash ads light up your computer screen like a fucking pinball machine. Yeah, it's really these animated ads and those asinine little video screens that slow down, freeze and even crash your browser.
Just imagine these advertisers being so fucking stupid they don't realize that they can't sell you shit if your PC is on the blink because its virtual memory has been high-jacked by RAM-robbing Flash ads. By greedy-ass dumb fucks who don't give a shit about you or your computer. They just want your money. And, hey, if my browser crashes or freezes — or even slows down — because of some dumb-fuck Flash ad, I'll make it my goal in life to never buy those advertisers' products or services again. So, if you fuck with my computer, you fuck with me. You stupid shitheads.
That's right, folks. You got it. If you're eating online ad shit and not liking it, it's your own goddamn fault. So, don't whine and cry to me about it. I took the time to piss and moan to you about it first. So there you go.
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